Melbourne singer/songwriter Emily Ulman has caused some trouble with the penis-hating PC brigade with her upcoming gig poster which depicts two guys pounding each others flounders.
The poster is for Ulman’s album launch for record ‘Wear It Well’ on the 18th of November, and several complaints have been lodged to the Advertising Standards Bureau for its placement on the city streets as well as being reported several times on Facebook.
Artist: Aaron Billings
The poster has clearly upset some people, although I think it’s unfair to make an assumption that those who have complained are doing so because of some sort of underlying homophobia. It’s rather obvious when looking at the poster that there are a multitude of reasons some might be uncomfortable, starting with the lack of reciprocation from the fellow on the left, which for the purposes of this article I have named Keith, with the other participant in this raucous doodle-pulling frenzy being named Kevin.
Keith is receiving a rather generous double-deal from Kevin, with Kev’s left hand placed gently on the top half of Keith’s chubbie. As you can see, there’s excellent coverage, and with Kevin’s thumb obscured one would have to take a guess that it’s placed along the shaft of Keith’s boom stick, allowing for more control and versatility of movement. Also, you’ll see that Kevin’s right hand busy playing with Keith’s bum-bum, and the sheer look of determination on his face would suggest this is something he takes very seriously and prides himself on top quality bumfoolery.
And then we have Keith. Furiously gripping Kevin’s meat popsicle with what is presumably his non-preferred hand, he looks like he’s more inclined to potentially to completely tear off poor Kev’s stiffie as opposed to a gentle and considerate fondle. I can tell from the slight downward direction of Kevin’s visible eyebrow that he’s not at all happy with the situation, and I don’t blame him – Keith doesn’t even look at all interested, not even making eye-contact with Kevin. He seems to be staring judgmentally at Kevin’s hair, which is odd considering they have the
exact same hair, and would look very similar if it weren’t for the few extra inches that the inconsiderate bastard Keith is packing in his pant-schmekel.
What’s your view on penises? Let us know in the comments.
Writer/Managing Editor for IPHYB
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