Song: Cardinal Deception, Cerebral Dislocation
Band: Orchestrating The Damned
Date of Release: Oct 7, 2013
Genre: Groove Death Metal (Really…?)
Reviewer: Judgement of Paris [Guest Writer]
For Fans Of: Hiroshima Will Burn, Lucas Mann’s Guitar Pro, and anyone with an inverted crucifix tattoo.
Why They Aren’t Famous: Fuck knows, any real metal head should have a copy of anything they do/have done.
You’re also an overly-enthusiastic homophobe, but deep down you know that you ‘finish’ thinking about dicks.
Meaty, throbbing, dicks.
You get busted for a snatch and grab at a shitty 7/11 and get 6 moths behind bars, where you drop the soap (half on purpose, half on accident) and you’re anally breached by a very large black man.
And you kinda like it…
For me, that sums up the first 20 seconds of this track.
It’s as if the drums don’t quite sync up with the music, which is a bit of a let down considering the rest of the track is pretty damn awesome.
Each riff in its own right is pretty interesting, and there’s a lot to pick from.
Most bands even in the ‘tech death’ genre would of written half the amount of riffs and played it out.
It’s definitely an adventure, but if you blink you’ll miss a step, it’s a busy and intricate song.
Some high screams wouldn’t hurt, but in saying that I didn’t miss them.
If the vocalist is this consistent live, he deserves to be taken out for an ice cream and a CD.
Clean, tight, brutal… And thank fuck there’s at least one super heavy band that knows what mids are.
There are a lot of guitarists out there trying to do what these guys seemingly do with ease. Given some work on the arrangements and a little more exposure, they could reach guitar god status.
Either way, there’s room for improvement with tone and dynamics in the mix.
In quite a few sections, it just doesn’t work.
It’s as if the drummer is just doing his own thing, or just wanted a particular beat and it didnt matter if it worked or not.
But for the few sections that everything fit together it was like being spat on by a unicorns cock. Magical but fucking rare.
As my first review I thought I was going to get dumped with a piece of shit that has been kicked between the other guys, but god damn was I wrong.
If there were tabs available, I’d attempt to learn it over the following 6 weeks.
Bass: 3/10 (Can only judge from what I hear )
Drums: 3/10 (Has chops, but just doesn’t fit in )
Production: 6/10 (Turn up the bass)
Lyrics: Yeah right/10
Songwriting: 7/10 (Would have been 10 without the first 20 seconds + better beats)
Overall IPHYB Rating: 7.5/10
Personal Enjoyment Factor: 8/10
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